I think it takes courage to let someone love us; to let them see behind the walls we’ve erected to protect ourselves; to become intimate. Incidentally, by intimate, I don’t mean sexually engaged.
I think we’re sometimes too busy trying to prove our self-worth to believe we actually have any.
I think that without self-worth, we think of ourselves as unlovable.
I think this, because this is how I’ve thought of myself for many years.
I think – I’m not alone.
God’s been teaching me about my own self-worth. A few years back He gave me the phrase intrinsic value. I looked it up, pondered it, wrote about, and shared it. But, did I believe it? Intrinsic value is the value someone is created with; worth we were already possessing when we showed up in this world. We don’t decide our value; our Creator gets to make that call.
The world around us dictates what we mean to society, or in comparison to what is perceived as valuable. But, we all value things differently. I place no value at all on a five pound bag of cocaine, yet those who deal it consider it of great value; many will give their lives in pursuit of obtaining it to sell or use.
Though beauty is in the eye of the beholder, our value is imposed by our Creator.
When we begin to dictate the value of human life, we, as a people, begin to embrace the idea that we can assume the role of God in our world. We make the rules. We find it acceptable to kill our unborn and easier to defend physician assisted suicide, calling it mercy killing. For that matter, if someone doesn’t value their life, why should suicide of any kind bother us? How does it impact our lives if they throw theirs away? Really, why care about anyone, especially if we perceive them to be valueless?
Was it Hitler who proposed seeking out those with abnormalities or handicaps and “putting them out of their own misery”?
When we take on the authority of assigning value, we begin to self-destruct.
I don’t believe we can make ourselves any more or less valuable to God. He created us with purpose, on purpose. That intrinsic value we showed up with only increases or decreases in the eyes of those who judge us, and if we accept their appraisals instead of the Word of God, our self-worth can completely disappear. Without worth, what is there to love? Without love, we die.
I think we need to get beyond the idea that we’re not pretty enough, or helpful enough, or friendly enough, or thin enough, or productive enough or in-demand enough…..
As I observed the residents in my father-in-laws nursing home, I saw one person after another that many no longer value, some that never even received visitors. They contribute nothing to society; many of them drain the financial resources of agencies like Medicare and Medicaid. Many can’t take care of themselves, or even speak; they don’t appear to contribute anything to anyone. So why do they have value? Why are they here?
Why do I have value? Why am I here?
Is that not the question at the core of our being?
For those who have discovered their purpose, celebration is in order. For without purpose, it’s hard to accept that we have value or that we’re worth the effort to love. Without love, we waste away, whether we’re being productive members of society – or not.
We all need healing.
No wonder the enemy of our souls is determined to convince us we’re unworthy of love. That leads to unworthiness of a God Who IS Love. And God SO loves us, that He sacrificed His Son for us…. (John 3:16)
I think I’m onto something. As it grows in me, I’ll share it with you. I’d love to hear your thoughts and input on this. Comment or message me, please!