Monday, May 4, 2015

A Sneakier Kind of Crisis

What kind of a crisis goes unidentified; unlabeled?

A health crisis might be faced when we or a loved one is given a frightening diagnosis.

An emotional crisis might rise up against us when suddenly a rug is pulled from beneath us; life takes a turn in an unexpected direction.

A financial crisis may loom over us if we lose our job, or if some insurmountable expense is hurled our way.

But, how do we define a crisis we feel sneak upon us, with no tangible beginning and no see-able cause?

Sometimes we just feel as though we’re going through something that rattles us or throws us off course, when nothing around us has realistically changed for the worse, at all.

We might call it depression – or oppression. We might simply call it a case of the blues, or a pity party. We could refer to it as “falling off the wagon” – when we’ve cleaned up a part of our lives for a significant period of time and we relapse. But, how does that relapse happen when we can’t point our finger at an action that caused it; the trigger that caught us off guard?
What about when this “crisis” occurs due to something in our subconscious that we’re not even aware that we’re carrying around with us?

If I was drowning, trapped in a car that was rapidly sinking and filling with water, surely I’d be in a panic. But, the ecstasy I’d experience should someone rescue me would be hard to put into words. So, right here, right now, I won’t look for that description.

My car, so rapidly sinking and filling with water, was my mind. I felt as though I was trapped there, spiraling to the bottom of an abyss too dark to fathom.

When rescued, I took on new life.

Even my email address exudes the victory as resqued1. I once displayed a vanity plate on my car which read, FORGVN1.

In my enthusiasm, I allowed myself to believe it was a one-time rescue; that I’d never be trapped in a car like that again.

But, the truth is, I’ve need to be rescued most every day. On the days I seem to sail through without a hitch, I surely ride on autopilot in my own vanity or on the tailwinds of a recent victory of some sort.

Daily, I need to immerse myself in the Living Word of God, or again I’ll begin to sink into a frailty I prefer to leave behind. I sink, not because I cannot swim, but because I have an enemy that would tie a weight around my neck to pull me from joyful freedom, only because he sees God living in me, thriving and lifting up the very hearts of those around me. He hates that.

Yet, oftentimes I allow myself to “forget” where my strength and joy comes from. As if I could forget to eat or breathe, no; I’d die. I ponder, how can I have so much disregard for the spirit in me?

Ah, no. I am the spirit in me.

So is this then, a lack of regard for my very self? I am not merely flesh and blood; that simply houses who I am. I’m not only the thoughts I think and beliefs I hold dear or the fears that sometimes seek to take control; that would be my soul, what makes me unique among humans.

Yes, the spirit I am, lives in this mortal house; why do I allow the needs of the house or the soul to usurp my need spiritual need for nourishment?

O foolish Helen! Who has bewitched you? …. How are you so foolish? After beginning by means of the Spirit, are you now trying to finish by means of the flesh? (See Galatians 3:1-5)

Though I exhort you all to remain in the Word of God, how do I sometimes think I can get by without it? Forgive me, Lord!

I am God’s forgvn1 and His resqued1 – but, it’s a daily thing; moment to moment. I need to remain connected to the very Source that gives me life and rescued me. And in this, yes, God is faithful. He will always draw me into His arms and hold me and empower me and forgive me and fill me with His joy. He believes in me, even when I stop believing in myself. He lifts me up and surrounds me, in His Word.

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