A Plan of Action: NEBAI

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This cocoon is getting a little tight and I’m getting a little restless. I need to stop being so hard on myself, I’m not a caterpillar permanently trapped in preparation mode. Though I’m anxious to break out, maybe I need “one more minute”.

I’ve been feeling a little anxious lately. Upcoming situations beg me to come up with doable plans to deal with it. However, I don’t see myself as a planner; I’m a pantzer (one who flies by the seat of their pants)!

Clearly, information may lead to transformation, but information itself isn’t transformation. Hence, no matter how much information I’ve crammed into my pretty little head, it won’t do a thing for me just rattling around in there, I have to implement it into my daily life.

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 Today I’m looking at some of the things that make me anxious. I know God doesn’t want me dwelling in anxiety. His Word tells me to be anxious for nothing. (Philippians 4:6) His Word also tells me that in this world I’ll have tribulations. Tribulations can bring anxieties along with them. (John 16:33)

I’m drawn back to being mindful. Though I regularly think of myself as ditzy or scatterbrained, I’m not. Those are just adjectives that catapult me into a negative mindset, or attempt to excuse me from being present and in the moment.

I’ve gleaned many tools to help be become a healthier person at the Metabolic Research Center, where I check in regularly. One of those useful tools is a behavior called “pattern interrupt”. Simply put, interrupting a pattern of destructive behavior, or even those that are just not good for me – such as temptations to eat something unhealthy. Anyone with an addiction can benefit by interrupting his or her addictive behaviors.

Interrupt it with what? A different behavior.

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 If it’s my habit to stop at Starbucks on my way home, I need to adopt a new routine. But, if it’s an impulse that suddenly strikes me, I can interrupt it by doing something else. As I sit here, now thinking about a Java Chip Frappuccino, a craving could easily mount. I could abandon my laptop and head over to Starbucks, perhaps justifying it by walking over there instead of driving. Yes, it’s that close. If instead, I choose to interrupt that temptation and pick up my weighted hula-hoop and go at it for ten minutes, by then the craving should pass.

I need to have a ready selection of viable options at my disposal. A list of things I can do instead of give in to the impulse. By viable, I mean things I will actually do. I need to find options I can do anywhere. Yes, here at home, I can grab my hula-hoop. But, if I’m driving down the road – what then? Your list will be different from mine, but we can interrupt a temptation easily, if we’re prepared for them and if we notice when they hit us.

For me, dietary temptations generally hit in the late afternoon. This is common. I may be able to avoid them altogether if I have a prepared or readily available snack with me. Maybe not.

Oftentimes, temptations seem to hit us unexpectedly. They’re most likely emotionally triggered, though. Perhaps emotional triggers cause our sugar to drop, or maybe our sugar dropping creates the emotional trigger. We’ll let scientists sort that out.

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Again, with the mindfulness; I need to pay attention. I need to notice what’s going on around me and inside of me when irresistible temptations attempt to consume me. I’m in charge, not the temptations.

Here’s my plan.

NOTICE when I’m anxious. I’ve seen that temptations quickly follow.

(Does my sugar dropping create part of that anxiety?)

EXAMINE what I’m feeling – briefly. Allowing my mind to wallow in something stressful won’t do me any good at all; I’d probably end up eating something sugary while I stew over what’s bothering me.

BREATHE. While looking at what has me falling prey to a temptation, I’ll focus on my breathing for a minute or two; breathing deeply and purposefully. That always calms me down noticeably.

ALLOW the pieces to fall in place. Many of life’s stressors are out of our control. Nevertheless, our response is always within our control. The old Serenity Prayer comes into play here.

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For me, this will mean confronting thoughts that pull me down and taking ownership of them, choosing whether I allow them to dominate my mind. Mindfully following the instructions in Philippians 4:8: thinking on the good things, will give me power.

When I confront my own thoughts, I need to do it in love or I can wind up mentally beating myself up again for thinking them. Self-love is not selfish.

Lastly, IMPLEMENT my alternative activity. I need to get busy on that list and keep a copy in my phone!

Hmmmm. NEBAI. I need an acronym to remember my plan! Is that even a word? I looked it up. How cool is this? According to several Hebrew dictionaries, nebai means fruitful! So, I greatly anticipate that my strategy will be fruitful. And I’ll pronounce it however I like. The “i” will be silent and I’ll make it rhyme with Reba, my favorite country singer.

Sounds easy enough, want to try it with me?

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“Be anxious for nothing, but in everything by prayer and supplication, with thanksgiving, let your requests be made know to God…” – Philippians 4:6 (NKJV)

“These things I have spoken unto you, that in me [Jesus] you may have peace. In the world you will have tribulation, but be of good cheer, I have overcome the world.” – John 16:33 (NKJV)

Today

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What if we succeed? What if – as a parent (or any task we complete, really), we’re successful at our job? Of course, we didn’t measure up every single day; no one does except Jesus Himself. But, thank God for grace!

But looking back at your seasonal job completed, there’s great news and for some of us a bit of hard news, too. The great news is we’ve raised self-sufficient, God-dependent men and women; people who will make an impact on the world - in big ways and in small everyday ways. They’ll be armed and equipped to raise their children.

As a learning, growing woman of God, naturally I want to see my children making an impact in the lives around them – for Christ, and to advance His kingdom. But, what if they’re not serving Christ – does that mean we failed? Absolutely not! God is our heavenly Father, we are His children, and do we all glorify Him? No. Is He a failure? No in every different way you can say it!

Are your children free to ask questions? Are they free to search out life on their own? Do they have resources available to them wherein they can pose their questions and argue their points, voice their frustrations? The answer to those questions, in most cases, is a resounding yes!

God is true to His Word and true to His promises. Diligently seek after His Word for your children and continue to pray it over them; His Word does not return void. We each have our own journey through this life, a journey we have to walk out on our own. We can be nurtured and taught, but we all make our own mistakes; we each trip over different rocks. Exercise your faith, see your child as God does and watch and pray, believing God for the fruit of your seeds sown.

But, what’s that hard news I mentioned?

As with any job well-done, and with any leaders who lead well – you’ll likely outlive the task at hand. Though we’ll always be our children’s parents, they won’t always need us like they did when they were little. If we were good parents (no parent is perfect), they will love us forever. Even if we were not-so-good, chances are, they’ll love us forever, even if they find along the way that they don’t actually like us.

Kissing one job good-bye and looking for another good and useful purpose can be a challenge. But when we sit and wallow in how well our children are doing, that’s a complete waste of self-pity! Realistically, I can’t think of any good use for self-pity. How many days will we throw away, never to be lived again, wishing we could cling to the usefulness we used to feel; being needed in the same ways we were in the past?

“To everything there is a season, and a time to every purpose under the heaven:” – Ecclesiastes 3:1 (KJV)

Not only have our children grown, we have too! We aren’t the same men and women we were when our children were young. We’re equipped to do even more, and to do it more effectively. Look at all the years of practice we’ve had, learning from mistake after mistake!

“The steps of a good [wo]man are ordered by the LORD; and he delighteth in his way.” – Psalm 37:23 (KJV)

Today is all we have. Yesterday is gone. Face it. Tomorrow isn’t promised. Don’t waste your precious moments looking back. Don’t long for what used to be, get excited about what is right now. Look up from any despair or anxiety or sorrow you may be wallowing in and experience what this moment in time holds for you. God’s plans are on-going and perfect. He knew this day would come and this part of our purposes here would be completed; He’s seen the end from the beginning. His game plan continues. It’s your choice, sit on the sidelines until you die – or jump back in the game. Our Head Coach calls the plays, not us. Seek Him today for what He’s got planned next!

And one of everyone’s favorites: “For I know the thoughts that I think toward you, saith the LORD, thoughts of peace, and not of evil, to give you an expected end. Then shall ye call upon me, and ye shall go and pray unto me, and I will hearken unto you. And ye shall seek me, and find me, when ye shall search for me with all your heart.” – Jeremiah 29:11-13 (KJV)