One-sided conversations: we don’t usually find them pleasant
unless we’re the ones doing all the talking. And for you non-talkers, they must
be agony to endure.
While I’m confident God loves it when we come to Him
chattering with excitement, or when we come to Him asking for help with a
problem, I think He’s equally if not more excited when He sees us listening for
His voice.
So, this post may be mostly for all the people out there that
are members of the Chatty Club; those of us who talk more than we listen. I
prefer to call myself loquacious instead of verbose, it just sounds sexier and
more flattering. We’re a pretty big club. You’ve probably run into more of us
than you thought you would.
We sometimes interrupt what you’re saying to get in our two
cents. We sometimes let our minds wander while you’re talking so we’re prepared
with something when it’s our turn, if you have a chance to interject at all.
Yes, we can be incredibly rude. For that, I apologize in the pithiest way
possible: Sorry.
We don’t mean to do it. We wish we could stop ourselves, and
sometimes we can – till we hear our own voice again and realize, “Oops – no, I
didn’t shut up yet”.
We need to quiet our mind long enough to adopt some method of
listening.
Some suggestions include writing out all that’s on our mind
first thing in the morning; a “morning dump” if you will.
Perhaps we could wait until evening for important
conversations, because, surely by then we’ll be all talked out. (Ha! Can that
even happen?)
Snap that rubberband on our wrist every time we hear our own
voice?
Ah, we need a sidekick who can motion to us to shut-up when
we’ve droned on for too long! Or someone who will pull us aside repeatedly to
remind us that yes, we’re talking too much again.
Whether we like it or not, we chase away friendships (or
potential friendships) because people will turn and walk the other way when
they see us coming.
We can lose out on a lot of valuable information when we’re
the one doing all the talking. Believe it or not, the other people in the
conversation have valuable input, too! Maybe even more worthy of being spoken
than what we’re spouting off about.
I’m no psychologist, but I’d venture to guess that our
constant chatter is attempting to fill some need in our lives.
Maybe as a child we were told that ‘children should be seen
and not heard’, so now we’re making up for lost time.
All of that rambling to say ---- we need to practice
listening. To become good at anything, it usually requires practice. This is no
different. Even when talking with our heavenly Father.
Practice listening. God can work with a good listener.
The following verses bring up anger, too. We’ll get to that
at another time.
“My dear brothers and sisters, take note of this:
Everyone should be quick to listen, slow to speak [and slow to become
angry, because human anger does not produce the righteousness that
God desires].” – James 1:19-20 NIV
Or – check out the wordier, more poetic version in the
Message Bible: “Post this at all the intersections, dear friends: Lead with
your ears, follow up with your tongue, [and let anger straggle along in the
rear. God’s righteousness doesn’t grow from human anger].” – James 1:19-20 MSG
