Half-full? Half-empty?

 

(picture from esmemes.com)

Half-full? Half-empty? Refill, please?

“If I meet your needs, you look to me; if I point you to Jesus, you look to Him to meet your needs.”

I can be a very giving person. If there’s any such thing as being too giving, I think I may fall into that trap sometimes. When I muster up the courage to tell someone “no” in response to a request for help or for a chunk of my time, I feel selfish.

I’ve shared memes on social media about self-care, and I’ve actually had friends respond in a way that judged me for not always putting other people first. But, at some point, if you’re not refilling your own “joy tank” or “happy tank” – where your energy is stored up, it runs dry.

If I’m pouring a drink from a pitcher into the glasses of the many people around me, eventually, I’ll need to go back for more. The pitcher isn’t bottomless, and neither are we.

(picture from thespruceeats.com)

I rejoice in my husband, who regularly sees when I’m feeling dry and knows how to help me refill. Sometimes, it’s as simple as a drive in the mountains. Other times, it takes a little more. He’s there for me.

It would be, not only wrong, but sinful for me to expect him to be the source of my refilling, though.

God uses Dave in my life for sooooo many things, one of them is to prompt me to slow down, or to rest, to refill my empty tank.

Sadly, sometimes, he comes last or feels the brunt of my frustrations when I’m feeling stretched – because I know he’ll always love me, unconditionally. 

Dave exemplifies the scripture: “Husbands, love your wives even as Christ also loves His church…” – Ephesians 5:25 (KJV)

Is he perfect? No. Is he perfect for me? YES! There’s not a doubt in my mind that God created us for each other, brought us together and has kept us together through the decades.

But, God has taught me along the way, that Dave is not the One Who gets to sit on the throne of my heart. That’s reserved for my Creator – the Lover of my soul.

Dave helps me refill my sanity reservoirs best when he’s pointing me back to Jesus. Sometimes that’s by taking me out into nature. Sometimes, it’s when he prays with and for me. Always, it’s as he loves me.

 So, know that it’s out of love when I say this: “If I meet your needs, you look to me; if I point you to Jesus, you look to Him to meet your needs.”

It’s out of love when you say it, too. Learn it. Believe it. Say it. Now, we get to work out what this looks like in our lives.

God’s reserves never run dry. We can always draw from Him. When we love each other and serve each other in our own strength, we set ourselves up to fall. When we love with God’s love and direct people to our Source, life gets a whole lot easier and less frustrating. We can actually be happy people!

(picture from braintap.com)

What's in....your mind?

(from clipart-library.com)

“Your mind is the command center of your life. For your mind to guide you into a good future, it needs to be free from painful memories you’ve been holding on to. The battle for your happiness is inside of you, specifically in your mind. Other people matter and influence your life. Ultimately, though, your thinking more than any other factor determines your happiness.” -Eric Thurman

This quote comes from a book on retirement that Dave and I are currently discussing, Thrive in Retirement, Simple Secrets for Being Happy for the Rest of Your Life. (Click here to go to Amazon to check out the book yourself.)

My mind tends to want to wrestle everything that doesn’t line up completely with the Word of God. Sometimes I try to make it line up, other times, I pray about it and God shows me what He was saying through the person making the statement; specifically, what He was saying to me.

This quote though, I don’t really wrestle with it at all; I’m pondering it. I like it. It just makes sense.

(from owlcation.com)

I was chatting with a woman about her retirement years. She wasn’t encouraging at all. She made it sound like each day was merely a matter of existing; waking up to breathe for another day. I almost wanted to ask, “So, you’re just waiting for the day you don’t live through?”

I don’t want to live out our retirement like that.

I suppose, just like every day of life before retirement, we have to choose whether or not to be happy as the day unfolds. But this book gives us food for thought as to how to get the most out of our latter years. It could all be applied to our younger years, as well. I think he needs a different title.

On another page he wrote, “It is my ambition to be happy for all the years I have left, and I want to infect you with the same enthusiasm. A thriving life of delight and meaning isn’t going to come as a streak of good luck. It will happen as the result of deliberate choices and actions.”

Again. Makes perfect sense to me!

The Bible tells us that what we think is what we’re going to be. Philippians 4:8 tells us to think on the good things. For my real fans, you know that’s part of my favorite chunk of scripture. Another portion of scripture tells us that “as a man thinks, so is he”. (Proverbs 23:7) Even secular books tell us this same profitable message.
Song: Think on the Good Things - The Gaither Trio

What we allow to roll around in our heads is going to shape our lives, whether we’re near retirement or just starting out in life.

(from me.me.com)

There’s a popular credit card commercial that asks, “What’s in your wallet?” Can't you hear him ask just by seeing his face? 

I ask, “What’s in your mind?”

You don’t have to answer out loud.

Many of us would answer that our minds are filled with our mounting problems. Or that we constantly think of how someone wronged us, or that we dwell on how unfair life seems to be.

Can many of us honestly say that our thoughts are filled with good things – all the time? That we dwell on our blessings more than our problems?

God tells us to “fret not” and to “fear not”. (Someone told me that the Bible says to “fear not” 365 times! Once for each day of the year.) God’s Word tells us to be anxious for nothing, that means not to worry about anything. It’s written there to be careful (full of care, worry) for nothing, because He does the caring for us. (1 Peter 5:7)

Maybe our enemy doesn’t have to tempt us with the “big sins” like murder or the like. Maybe all he has to do is get us worrying, about anything, actually.

(from Facebook.com)

I read a meme on social media, and then shared it myself. It read: “The serpent did not tempt Adam and Eve to steal, to kill, to commit adultery; he simply tempted them to question God’s Word.”

Ponder THAT!


Think on the Good Things Gaither Trio

Our Crazy Love

I hide the silliest things from people.

The other day someone asked me how Dave and I have managed to still be so in love after all these years. Besides the obvious, that God is the glue that holds us together through thick and thin, the only thing I could say is that we are without a doubt, the silliest, goofiest couple ever. If a sitcom were created about our married life, most of it would get laughs primarily because folks would say, “No one’s really that goofy that much of the time.” Hey – if you can’t laugh at yourselves and each other, a couple doesn’t really stand much of a chance, in my opinion.

Sure, you’ve got to be quick to forgive, generous with mercy and sincere compliments, but you’ve got to know you have permission to laugh; loud and often.

Yes, you need to build each other up and respect each other and speak positive words over each other; you need to pray over each other – sometimes out loud! But, without humor, we’d miss the best parts of each other. Don’t you think?

Whether we’re playing a board game, hiking together or simply watching television from the comfort of our bed, Dave and I know we can laugh, spontaneously.

Not necessarily the kind of laughter that makes fun of each other, but rather, the kind of laughter that makes fun with each other.

I admit it, I’m an oddball. But, I have to think I’m not the only oddball out there. Most of the time, the side of our marriage we show to the world around us tempers our goofiness. Sometimes folks may only see the facet of our relationship where I get snippy with Dave.

No doubt, if you’ve known us long at all, you’ll see the side of life where I’m “lovingly suggesting a better way to do things” – i.e. my way.

You might see our serious sides.

But, you probably won’t see even a measure of the silliness. Why? I ask myself….

Perhaps we just don’t want folks thinking marriage is easy? Nah. Everyone knows you get out of a marriage what you put into it. Well, in most cases. I think.

Maybe I’m actually backwards about showing off how good we have it. So many couples around us seem to struggle all the time. Wouldn’t putting our happiness on display only make them feel bad about their squabbles? Nah, probably not. Perhaps it would even be encouraging to see that two messed up humans can make it work for their entire lifetime together, despite the mountains they have to climb together and individually.

Maybe it’s the (false) idea planted somewhere in the back of our heads that whispers to us, saying that there are folks watching and waiting for us to fail? Nah, who cares what others think? If they’re thinking we’ll drift apart or face something marriage can’t handle, they’re wrong.

Maybe, it’d be considered bragging? We all know how morally wrong that would be, right? Nah, anyone who knows me knows I’ve screwed up a lot, bragging about something God is doing in our lives doesn’t even fall into that category.

Hmmmm. What could it be? Why would we be so modest as to hide our joy?

God knows I’m quick to brag about the grandchildren to anyone who will listen, and even many who could totally care less. Would declaring our happiness be prideful?

Maybe our happiness doesn’t need to be a horn we toot too loudly – hopefully everyone can see through the thin veil of discretion and knows how deliriously content we are in each other’s arms.

For the record, no one this side of heaven could make me happier than Dave. No mere mortal could love me better or more consistently, no matter what each day brings.

I love you, Babe! Forever and always, Me!

“Now unto him that is able to do exceeding abundantly above all that we ask or think, according to the power that worketh in us, unto him be glory in the church by Christ Jesus throughout all ages, world without end. Amen.” -  Ephesians 3:20-21 (KJV)

“Let all bitterness, and wrath, and anger, and clamour, and evil speaking, be put away from you, with all malice: and be ye kind one to another, tenderhearted, forgiving one another, even as God for Christ’s sake hath forgiven you.” – Ephesians 4-31-32 (KJV)

“Giving thanks always for all things unto God and the Father in the name of our Lord Jesus Christ; submitting yourselves one to another in the fear of God.” – Ephesians 5:20-21 (KJV)

“For this cause shall a man leave his father and mother, and shall be joined unto his wife, and they two shall be one flesh. This is a great mystery: but I speak concerning Christ and the church. Nevertheless let every one of you in particular so love his wife even as himself; and the wife see that she reverence her husband.” – Ephesians 5:31-33 (KJV)

“I thank my God upon every remembrance of you…. Being confident of this very thing, that He which hath begun a good work in you will perform it until the day of Jesus Christ:” – Philippians 1:3 & 6 (KJV)

Thinking Out Loud Ed Sheeran (youtube.com)

Nothing Like a Great Meal!

 

This weekend was long. It started out fun but ended up wearing my patience thin.

 

You know that rumble you get in your stomach when it’s been too long since your last meal? That’s the rumble in my spirit when I’ve gone too long without God’s Word. It manifests itself in irritability and lack of patience, vulnerability to offense, among other things. My spirit feels angry when it’s hungry.

 

When I find I’m being easily offended, I either need to make time for a meal; some serious reading of the Word, or at the very least, a snack.

 

Christian books are great and there’s plenty of time for gleaning from the wisdom God shares with us to share with each other, but there’s nothing like digging into the Word.

 

Sometimes I opt to listen to the Word via www.biblegateway.com – where you’re given the option to hear it read to you. So when I’m doing something mindless (and quiet), like dusting, I’ll do that. However, with as many questions that get filtered through my mind, I often stop my dusting, grab my pen and scribble notes. Failure to do so would result in me gleaning less from my meal; like standing up while scarfing down a quick burger. It may fill your belly, but it’s a lot less satisfying than sitting down to enjoy a full, healthy, meal with veggies. Not to mention the indigestion you’re likely to get from swallowing that burger without adequate time to chew.

 

So, while listening to the Bible is good, sitting down to absorb what I’m learning is better.

 

All of that said, the mere hearing of the Word will encourage our spirits and lift our moods. I find that the offense I may have been carrying around all morning is much easier to let go of, it’s easier to smile, it’s easier to make good decisions like – yes, I’ll go for that walk, instead of simply thinking about it while I snack or play around on the internet.

 

It’s much easier to be thankful in all things and it’s easier to love when we’re in God’s Word, consistently.

 

I’m reading Matthew today. Where are you?

 

(Photo courtesy www.Outback.com)